May 6th, 2020


The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Tuesday, May 5- Wednesday, May 6

(There's a knock at the door. Buffy goes to answer it and Spike is standing there, cowering below a smoking blanket.)
SPIKE: Help me.
(Buffy shoves him back and he goes tumbling.)
SPIKE: Ohh! What part of "help me" do you not understand?
BUFFY: The part where I help you.
SPIKE: Come on, I'm parboiling out here.
BUFFY: Want me to help make it quicker?
SPIKE: Invite me in.
GILES: No. It's fairly unlikely.
SPIKE: Oh, damn it! look, I'm safe. I can't bite anyone. Willow, tell' em what I did.
WILLOW: You said you were gonna kill me, then Buffy.
SPIKE: Yes, bad, but let's skip that part and get to the part where I couldn't bite you.
WILLOW: It's true. He had trouble performing.
SPIKE: Yeah, well, it looks like they've done me for good. Um...
BUFFY: What are you saying?
SPIKE: I'm saying that Spike had a little trip to the vet and now he doesn't chase the other puppies anymore. I can't bite anything. I can't even hit people.
BUFFY: So you haven't murdered anybody lately? Let's be best pals.
SPIKE: I've got information. About the soldier boys you were fighting. Got the inside scoop. Come on, what have you got to be afraid of?

~~Pangs (Season 4)~~

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